To sum up the parts, not every movie can be awesome. There will always be bumps in the ride which may not come with a cautionary sign. Worst case scenario is when you enter a movie expecting brilliance and end up having a sore experience. You rise up to the movie expecting heavens and skies and you fall spreadeagled on the floor, heartbroken.
Compiled below are the top 5 heart breakers of 2013 which resulted in numerous accounts of headaches, nausea, vomits and severe heart conditions among the viewers!
From here on, Rest In Peace Dear Expectations.
From here on, Rest In Peace Dear Expectations.
5. Gangster Squad
Sean Penn, with due respect, to me you are one of the greatest actors today. But why in God's good name did you try to pull Al Pacino? That alone if nothing else made me hate Gangster Squad to my guts. Well, that and the squeaky irritating voice modulation of Ryan Gosling. Enough said!
4. After Earth
Friend: Is M. Night Shyamalan of Indian origin?
Me: Yeah, you betcha! He is an Indian born American screenwriter who directed the famous 'The Sixth Sense'.
Me: Yeah, you betcha! He is an Indian born American screenwriter who directed the famous 'The Sixth Sense'.
Friend: Yeah, I saw that movie, the plot twist dropped my jaw on the floor, it was actually awesome. I heard he made another flick this year, one with Will Smith and his son. That must be pretty cool too, right?
*Both bursts out laughing*
3. A Good Day To Die Hard
A Good Day to Die Hard is an exemplary scenario of 'How to make people hate an Iconic Character' manual. It takes the thrill and intelligence off a Die Hard movie and fill it with absurd humor that nobody wants. And guess what, it comes with additional features like the saggy faced, self deprecatory lunatic John McClane and his infuriating punchline that says, "I'm on a holiday". Remember Die Hard back in '88, we better watch that again.
A good alternative name would have been: A Good Day to Kill a Franchise.
2. The Counsellor
Before Watching: My my, what have we got here? Ridley Scott directing a star studded international drug thriller and Cormac McCarthy penning the script, legendary is the word we are looking for people!
While Watching: *Snores* *Snores* Oh, random gun fight. Wow, that shit is cool. No, don't you start talking again, nooo. Man, why? *Snores* *Snores*
After Watching: What a crap!
1. The Wolverine
From the director who previously made awesome movies from shitty subjects, comes a rotten movie from an amazing subject, The Wolverine. Get ready to watch two hours of talking, and more talking and some more talking as they take our favorite mutant and smother him to nothingness by giving him wooden claws in the climax. I mean, seriously, who does that?
Me: Well, lets believe it never happened. It never existed.
Me: Well, lets believe it never happened. It never existed.
Breaking News: 20th Century Fox recently scheduled The Wolverine 2 date as March 2, 2017.
Me: Goddamit!